when i was younger i had a really bad fear of vampires when i was going to sleep so my older brother gave me a watch that he set to like 8 hours ahead so that it was always daytime on the watch when i was asleep and he told me it would confuse the vampires and they would think it was daytime and get scared of the sun and leave me alon
Your brother is the best
Unsure of how to confess your love to someone? Try this:
- Acquire several dozen limes.
- Go up to them and then drop all the limes.
- Start picking them up, but keep dropping them. The clumsier you look the better.
- Keep doing this until you have their attention (this could take up to thirty minutes).
- Finally gather up the limes. Try looking a bit sheepish.
- Look them deeply in the eyes and say, “Sorry. I’m bad at Pickup Limes.”
- Marry them.
the joker got his scars from trying to put a whole pringle in his mouth at once
I was reading about Thomas Jefferson’s medical history and
Violent headache for two days after behaving awkwardly in front of a girl he fancied (March 1764, age 20)
Loneliness was there when you weren’t.